12.14.2010 @ approx. 5:43 a.m., NYC time

***

the babies were enchanted:

***

Alejandro was *mega*enchanted:

he loved*it-loved*it:

***

then Carmen did too:

this morning I woke up and I didn't know what I was going to post about before headin' out to sub. It was somewhere in between 5:30am and 6:30am Land, and I'm like...ugh!...maybe I'll post later.

then, from downstairs, I hear my mother yell, "wake up and bring your camera!"

this is what resulted.

i love it. i love them.

***

happy happy *snowy*enchanted* Tuesday.

*orange* & *pinks* & *yellow*

love my November.

i think November & i think my birthday.

i think November & i think sweaters, like, layers of sweaters.

i think November & i think thanksgiving,

special warm toasty feelings with family & people i love.
***

this year, i'm not so sure about "thanks"-"giving" for me.

it feels more like

"thesis"-"taking"

***

don't get me wrong,

i am extremely thankful

for my blessings, but

i wish i could experience the holiday

as it's meant to:

to relax,

to reflect,

to eat, laugh, & be merry

with family

& think on the past months of the year

and the few weeks left of the year,

and realize with all your soul, that you're blessed.

***

instead,

i'm probably working at the restaurant

from 11am to 9pm,

and

will be surrounded by stress & worry as to

the status of my thesis paper,

due within a few days after Thanksgiving.

***

college sucks the life out of me.

it sucks the life out of everyone i know who goes to one.

however,

ironically,

i'm thankful i've had the means to go to school,

unlike so many in the world,

i just wish it was actually beneficial to my being,

instead of just 'looking good on paper.'

***

***

anyway...

...November,

i think i like you.

i mean, i do, i like you.

this Nov, though, i

kinda wish i could just "UP" myself out of responsibilities

by hanging on to a bunch of *orange*pink*yellow* balloons,

sail through the sky,

and end up at a Thanksgiving tea party with

all those close to my heart, living and passed on.

up...up...and away, Novem.

*postcards* from *south*fla*

hey, readers.

*

so,

I still have today,

tomorrow,

and

a tiny bit of Wednesday

left in

Florida.

*

[pic above of my splashin' feet while lounging with family at my great aunt tina's group pool]

*word blurts*

of the past three days so far:

pack,

airport,
plane,

TURBULENCE,

land,

gratitude,

palm trees,

heeeaaaattttt,

Grams,

baked clams,

shrimp cocktail,

hugs,

kisses,

laughs,

loudness,

magenta,

Aunt Tina,

cousin,

cousin,

sleep,

11:00,

breakfast,

waffles,

OJ,

love,

laughs,

bikini,

flip-flops,

chipped-mani,

pool,

splashing,

fancy dildoos,

chlorine,

wrinkles,

bathing caps,

lounging,

knotty hair,

miss my sis,

shower,

dinner,

soup,

Marsala,

twice baked,

show,

rock and roll,

live,

dance,

boogie,

boys in tights,

us girls,

mall visit,

Barnes & Noble,

chocolate ice cream cone,

bomb,

goodnight.

up

morning,

quick breakfast,

talk of the kitties,

kisses goodbye,

off to key west,

pics pics,

horizon,

checkers,

hicks,

hospitality,

mopeds,

endless riding,

up and down,

40 mph,

beaches,

duval,

polydactl cats,

hemingway,

balcony,

sweat,

moped moped moped,

buffalo shrimp,

mojito city,

date night,

heels,

dress,

moped,

sunset celebration,

awesome pics,

Jimmy,

6 drinks,

2 people,

cigar shop,

salsa music,

fail.

laugh,

tipped moped.

fail.

room,

night.

*

me,

computer,

now.

*

time for some continental breakfast, and then maybe a jet*ski adventure.

**

talk to you when i do.

**

have a nice monday...

no images would *fit*the*bill* today but these:

*it's*official*

and when i

step*off*that*plane*

one week from today,

this is going to be me:

i'm going to gaze at those palm trees
in utter, raw gratitude for their existence in my world
at that moment.
[...and i'm going to be wearing one of my three fabulous new pairs of sunglasses while i do it]
[...i'm going to need to with all that sun on my face...i hope...]
***

i will raise up my palms to the palms.

***

let's plow through these next seven days, shall we??

***

*saturday*dreamin'*

it's SuMMeR...

...my favorite season of the year.

**

i want everything to slow down.

also,

i want to be teleported this morning.

here:

***

***

maybe some day-dreamin' breakfast??

[minus the ashtray...nasty!]

hmmm...lemme grab my bag...

[hee hee!]

***

***

after breakfast...

some *sand-exploring*

[oh, what little critters will i find?]

don't wake me up! don't wake me up!

*saturday*beach*dreamin'*

*beach, bangs, & body art*

just 3

of the many

things

*on my mind*

***********************************************************

*beach*
**
**
**
**
**
*bangs*

**

**

**

**
**

[strategically placed]

*body art*

**

**

**

**

**

What's been on yo' mind lately??

Hawaii (Hula) Vibes is BACK!...[for today]

elsie

from

A Beautiful Mess

posted some pics & some words about a trip to

Hawaii

she took.

wish i was goin' sometime soon.

i am, today, actually...in my dreams.

good gosh, how I need the peace of the sun on my cheeks and the calm of the tropical breeze in my hair right about now.

Love yous. Happy Sat.

OMG!! Good Lord in Heaven!!

[pic above found here & picniked by me]

** ** ** **

** ** **

ya'll know how I feel about

*buLLdogs*.

** ** ** ** **

** ** ** **

** ** **

well,

upon viewing this post on her site,

i stumbled upon
The Rockstar Diaries, a

BLOG that contained...

[wait, lemme catch my breath]

THIS POST...

** ** ** ** **

** ** ** **

** ** **

** **

**

that post is the stuff of my dreams:

a sunny afternoon,

my very own *bulldog*,

&

a

mother

f***in'

bull

friggin'

dog

birth

day

party!!

** ** ** ** **

** ** ** **

** ** **

Hooray!

Alleluia!

There are other people out

there like me!

Where are they??!!??!!

There's gotta be some in NY!

[well, i guess i'd need a bulldog first]

but...one day.

one day.

** ** ** ** **

** ** ** **

** ** **

** **

**

in the meantime,

i'll student teach for no pay,

& go to college for a few more months

& sit in a classroom listenin' to teachers

talk to me about stuff i already know,

stuff I've known since grade school

about teaching & life & learning...

...i'll do some more wondering around

this world in old, stretched out clothes

listening to my mom & dad argue every 20 seconds,

until the divorce between them is final,

& a whole NEW bunch of agonizingly painful

life changes arise from that.

** ** ** ** **

** ** ** **

** ** **

** **

**

Wow.

i didn't expect this post to take that turn at the end there.

*wah wah wah*

gosh, you hear me?

hee hee.

i just know

[to be incredibly redundant]

that

*one day*

i'm gonna have my own bulldog. maybe 2.

...and it'll be great.

** ** ** ** **

** ** ** **

** ** **

** **

"A goal without a plan is merely a dream." -- Elbert Hubbard

**

**

I guess I gotta start plannin' then, huh?

reflectively reflective

on this rainy Sunday mornin' in NYC,

*amanda*

my *most* favorite part(s)

we all have favorite parts.

* *

* *

this is my most favorite part.

[pic above found amongst these.]

* *
* *
these are also parts that I love most.
* *
* *
everyone...
...every single person...
deserves these parts in their own life,
in their own way.
* *
* *
yeah.
* *
* *
so.
* *
* *
okay.
* *
* *

true love is true love is true love is true love where is true love is true love is true love is

Hawaii (Hula) Vibes Week comes to an *end*

Aloha, to you.

It means hi

it means goodbye

& it means love.

That one word has all three meanings.

*

This is important to me because with my BLOG's

Hawaii (Hula) Vibes Week

coming to an end, I feel a sense of all three.

*
*

Aloha Hello

to you for returning, or first visiting,

and

to my new dream of visiting Hawaii *one day.*
It's kind of like me saying,

"Aloha, dream, it's nice to have you in my head.

I hope to one day make you a reality, and then

we can both be blissed out in celebration.

Won't that be exciting?!"

*

*

Aloha Goodbye

to my original dream which caused me to make

this week (Hula) Vibes Week in the first place - the dream of

winning a contest my local news was hosting.

I would've won a five-night stay in O'ahu, but

I know I didn't win because they supposedly told

the winner Friday.

I didn't get any call.

*

*

Aloha Love

because my small, seemingly insignificant searches

on the web for all things Hawaii and (Hula) have

brought me such a high, weightless feeling of contentment,

almost like a know there is a far away place in this world

whose culture and scenery and environment will be so

fantastical to me.

[I even found this blog I'll be regularly checking out.]

*

*

maybe i'm not meant to win a contest now.

*

maybe i'm meant to travel there on a whim.

*

maybe i'll be there when or if this happens:

maybe i'll be there while like this. OMG.

*

Who knooowssss??!!

*

*

But I know I've realized a dream this week,

a dream of where I wanna get myself,

one way or the other.

*

*

[my BLOG has been magical for this reason, alone, if for none other]

*

I know I'll get there one day.

Hawaii (Hula) Vibes **Valentine's Day**

in my head's world, I am wearing this dress today.

Alllllll day today.

(pic above located here.)

*

*

in a perfect world,

my perfect Valentine's Day

would take place in the most gorgeous spot of

*Hawaii*

amongst palm trees and beach breeze,
and include a hula show,

me in this dress on an 85 degree night,

a white flower in my hair,

my hand in my Love's,

over a great great dinner.

*

afterward,

there would probably be dancing,

both fast and slow.

*

*

Happy Valentine's Day,

everyone.

*

*

love, love, love,

*and then*

love some more.

searchin' for Hawaii (Hula) Vibes

in my dreams

the Hawaiian breeze

is blowing in between my knees

on my long white skirt and underneath

while i'm standing on the balcony

looking at the evening sea,

then you gently call to me

- ever so sweet -

"it's time to eat"

i turn, and you've pulled out my seat

genuine smile, your top teeth

did i do something right, i think,

or was i born this incredibly lucky?

by

me

*swing & read*

we're supposed to get *snow* late afternoon

and all day tomorrow,

here in

NYC

i'd rather come home from student teaching

today and escape here.

ride my bike.

park it on a tree.

bring my studies and *eat pray love*

sit in a spring dress,

on a spring late Friday evening,
and

swing and read

Swing and Read, my dears,

swih-hih-hiiiiiing and ree-heh-heeeeed...

Awwwww yeaaahhh.

the *weekend* of *tears*

~this is the *sister* post to yesterday's post~

in addition to the tear-jerker morning I had sunday,

i ALSO watched

My Sister's Keeper

with my mom & Bitt

sunday night

(...aaaannnnddd The Lovely Bones friday night,

which we won't get into just yet, if at all,

but pretty much know that it was

the *weekend* of *tears*)

THE.

TEARS.

WERE.

FLOWIN'.

the tears were flowin' HARD.

I believe my quote was:
"my eyes weren't puffy and filled with dark-circles
enough, sooo 'Let's watch My Sister's Keeper!!' Great idea!"

the scene on the beach is mesmerizing.

the song that plays during it
just
*wrapped my heart in a heated blanket
& rocked it to heaven*.

the song
is my dreams,
and
sums up the
feeling
this past weekend
has given me,
and i now walk with.

it's all about love,
Love,
LoVe,
Love love Love,
lOve.

my *1995* is HERE

oh, ever the winds of *chance*

my sunday morning started with a

cup of coffee,

web surfing,

& flippin' through channels for

something decent to watch.

Then,

there

on the Fios guide popped my past:

Beverly Hills, 90210

& upon my soul signaling me to

keep it on,

I discovered it was

my favorite season,

with my two favorite characters

from all

10 seasons of the show:

*Dylan & Toni*

(pic above found here.)

The episodes that aired sunday morning
were first aired in 1995,
when I was in the 5th grade,
and I still
*to this day*, on occasion,
think about how much I loved watching
this fictional couple love each other.

Even though they're characters,
and their story is fiction,
in this case,
the fiction transcends the screen**,
and enters your heart.

i believe that's what it did for
me back in 1995,
and
only this past sunday,
fifteen years later
did ever the winds of *chance*
re-awaken their story in my heart
...and what timing!

i can only assume someone or thing
hears the confusion in my heart,
and wants me to know
it'll be okay.

i had to share this with you, readers,
because it had me in tears, on
a lazy sunday morning in my pajamas.

Here's some clips from
*Dylan & Toni's*
story:





(great caption from the above clip @ 4:40)
Toni: Kelly looks absolutely stunning tonight, doesn't she?
Dylan: I really hadn't noticed. I was too busy looking at you.
Toni: Good answer.

Of course, Dylan asks Toni to marry him, but I don't have that clip.
But after the proposal, here's some more:



Dylan: All my life, people have told me I was running away from something. I always felt I was running to something. I just didn't know what that was until now. I love you. I always will.
Toni: You don't have to run anymore, Dylan...I love you with all my heart and soul.


The gorgeous song in the above clip is

Nobody Knows Me

by

Lyle Lovett

**reader, my dear, please don't underestimate the power of the T.V. as a vehicle for *art*. Just like the printed page, when written well & acted well, even a cheesy show like Beverly Hills, 90210 can be divine poetry. I encourage you to open your heart, and hear it. :)

Okay, I'm wiping the tears off now, hee hee.

I'm off to GRAD school.

I have a presentation to make today.

Love yous.

xoxo,

*amanda*

a merry Christmas *eve* moment

i thought i'd take a breif moment to wish you, reader, as solitary and singled out as you are on my newborn baby BLOG, a merry merry holiday.

i'm an old soul in a (relatively) young package and even now, with a quarter-a-century behind me, I think: "how many of these good ol' christmas eves do i have left until I have no more left?"

is that morbid of me? perhaps. but thoughts like those help me to breathe in every second of

my sister 'christmas'-ing up herself in the mirror,

my mom making fish salad,

the garlic and lemon and ocean smell of the fish salad...mmm...,

the boyfriend and cat sound asleep, giving me a brief few moments before...oop!...and there goes the cat! (she smelled the fish salad.)

Goodness gracious, I love winter for it's beginning days, and then...ick.

You will see.

i'm going to try to appreciate it this go'round.

what else? oh!

I stumbled upon the photo below while looking for winter and christmas image-inspiration (as we BLOGGERS, or I - wannabe blogger) do...and uh!

this is part of that world...

...that world my thoughts get stuck in so often...my world of *dream scenes* where what I want my life to become and be encompassed with lives.

have a merry merry jolly jolly super-happy lovely christmas eve and actual day. :)

remember:

yesterday is history.

tomorrow is a mystery.

today is a gift...that's why it's called the present.

*one day* i'll live this *dream scene*...one day one day one day...

...oop! and there's the boyfriend waking up. Gotta feed him some fish salad. ;)

see...*told* ya.

sooo...found this here.
*hummida hummida*

{drool drool drool}

i wanna walk out of a cool, Italian alleyway art store & find my most maRvelous *moped* parked on some eclectic street like this *one day*...

...i hope i *dream this scene* tonight <3...